Thoughts of the day..

Got this email long time ago.. and I somehow.. agree with wat's written.. maybe you guys should think about it and let me know wat's on ur mind?
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1) 没有一百分的另一半，只有五十分的两个人
There is no 100% from this someone, only 50% from 2 person..

2） 付出真心才会得到真心却也可能伤得彻底 ; 保持距离就能保护自己却也注定永远寂寞
In order to get one's heart, you have to give yours away..but there's a risk of getting your heart back.. in a broken form ; Distance yourself will protect you.. but you'll be destined to be lonely..

3） 通常愿意留下来跟你争吵的才是真正爱你的
Those who are willing to stay with you after a fight are those who really do love you..

4） 有时并非对方不在乎你，而是你把对方看得太重
At times, it is not that this someone does not care for you.. but it is you that weight him (her) too "heavily".

5） 冷漠，有时并非无情而是种避免被伤害的工具
Coldness, at times, are not impersonate but a tool to avoid broken heart..

6） 如果我们之间有1000步的距离，你只要跨出第一步，我就会朝你方向走其余的999步
If there's a 1000 steps separated us, if you are willing to make the first step, I will make the rest 999 steps..

7） 为你难过得快乐的是敌人；为你快乐的快乐的是朋友；而为你难过而难过的就是那些该放进心里的人
Those who are happy when you are down are your enemy; those who are delighted when you are happy are your friends ; Those who are sad when you are down.. are those that you should keep in your heart..

8） 就算是BELIEVE中也藏了一个LIE
Even LIE hide between BELIEVE

9） 真正的好朋友并不是在一起就无所不聊而是在一起`就算不说话也不会感到尴尬
True friends are not those who discuss about everything but those who do not weird even when they are together and speak nothing..

10） 朋友就是被你看透了还能喜欢你的人
Friends are those who know you very very well.. still able to like you for who you are..

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and I would like to add few more..

11) The only unchangeable is change itself.. whether it is for the best or the worst.. we would still have to accept the fact that we are changing.. and so do our environment.. our feelings.. and thoughts..

12) When you feel like the world is "shutting down" on you.. high chances are.. you are shutting down yourself towards the world..


So.. agree with me ? or anything other things to add on to?

Where are the good old days??

Somehow.. I suddenly missed the good old days where.. I was still young.. too young to even know wat does money meant to our life.. so young that we only know the meaning of love.. and happy ending.. and will never know wat is meant by hurt.. until we fall down and hit our head.. but few min later.. we will still stand up.. and continue to enjoy the joy of life.. Where are the good old days?

When I was young.. I hope to grow old.. to understand what to meant to live in this world.. though I'm still in the process of figuring it out.. I learn that it is hard to find happy ending.. and that.. the meaning of hurt.. does not mean bleeding.. and that bring hurt physically.. sometimes.. might be less "hurt" .. How can it be so difficult to know something that seems so easy to be understood?

I used to think that my grandma is a real good person.. though she don't really know who I'm.. or wat I'm currently studying (yet she knows all other grand children condition and even their name).. what else can I said beside.. maybe.. I'm not so impressive for ppl to remember me.. or at least. for her to know me by my name.. but.. it is not a big deal.. it taught me something..one day.. I will be someone.. so that.. I will not be anybody any more..

I missed the days where I was worry- free where I can do wat i like all day long.. there were the days I can cycle all day long with my brother and explore the "taman" around us.. find out how beautiful our nature is.. and how much fun we had with people around us.. look at where we are now.. will you actually feel safe cycle around with no companion ? I mean.. if you are a boy.. maybe you will not worry so much.. but if you are a girl.. you will be afraid of kidnappers.. rapers.. where are the good old days?

I missed my frens where we organised events together.. and the hard work we have been through just to make things look perfect on the day of the event.. I missed having the yam cha session.. and look around us now.. we are far apart.. with all different courses we pursuing.. I guess we will be further apart on our journey of life.. but I hope the good old days will forever remain in our heart.. and the good old memories had made us a better person..

Trolley Thief!!

I've been working in Cosway for sometime.. and the change of concepts frm close concept to open concept.. so far.. I don really think it is fair and a total good idea for this shop of mine.. things have been going missing.. obviously there are thieves going in and out of the shop. but we can do nothing about it.. If you have been to this cosway at Tesco.. you will know the crowd.. and the number of ppl during peak hours.. I don even have the time to sit down for hours.. seriously!!.. how on earth do I have the chance to observe ppl around me right?

Anyway, 2 days ago, there was this one nice customer of mine.. I was serving her.. and she seems to be really nice..and it is just like a normal customer with naughty kid(named as Kak A).. and so, I don't really give a damn.. I mean.. I was so darn tired.. and was hoping for a chance to sit down for just 5 min.. few min after tis customer with this naughty kid went away.. I heard this Malay customer (Kak B) shouting " Where is my trolley?!".. and I was like.. SHIT!.. here we go again..

THis is not the first time this happened.. there was once a customer came in my shop and when he went out.. he found his trolley LOST.. and he bought about 300++ .. but my boss was smart enough to get it back for him.. because she saw one old lady took it after she confirmed that it was hers.. and we thought this won happened again.. but we were wrong!!

Out of our expectation.. this time it was a kid! and we managed to trace the whole process through our CCTV!.. and so.. our "supervisor" managed to trace tis nice customer , Kak A.. and to our suprise.. she told us that no such thing happened.. because she owned 2 ikan bakar shops.. and so.. there is no need for her to steal ppl's stuffs.. and so on.. we can do nothing ..

Today, my boss tried to give Kak A a call again.. and somehow.. the customer came back today.. claiming that she managed to asked her son.. and her about 10 years old kid was the one moving the Kak B's trolley to another place.. which caused the Kak B to lost her stuff.. and Kak A is nice enough to come back and willing to pay back her lost..

This story tells me something: I should never assume all mankind (mostly Malays are thieves.. which I did.. I thought the kid was asked by his parents to do so..my bad.. and I'm truly sorry for thinking so.. to be honest.. I thought the Kak A will never enter this shop ever again and Kak B will never get back her money or ever find out that is our customers that stole her stuff...) To all Malays that read my post.. I'm truly sorry for thinking so.. though some Malays are having some bad habits.. but it is my bad for assuming all..

I'm sorry...

I came across this email not very long ago.. one touching article and I decided to translate it to English.. just that..I don't have a perfect English.. so.. bare with me ok ?! This is a story about I'm sorry..
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男孩和女孩从小就认识，男孩经常约女孩一起去村外的池塘边捉小虾，每次男孩总是满载而归，女孩却是两手空空，女孩总是失落的含着眼泪，独自一个人回到家，然后闷闷不乐。晚饭前，男孩敲响女孩家的门，女孩一见是男孩，扭头就走，男孩追上前，对女孩说：“对不起，我把你的虾都捉走了，给，我把它们养在小鱼缸里，送给你。”女孩眉头一放，慧心的笑了，就这样反复着他们纯纯的童年，转眼，他们各自成长着。

——纯纯的“对不起” 。


男孩总是喜欢戏弄女孩，经常会把女孩逗到哭，然后又去哄女孩到她笑为止，直到长大后，也是如此。
男孩经常偷偷的把女孩的自行车轮胎的气放到没有，然后躲在远处，看女孩着急的走投无路，等着女孩拨通他的手机，然后破口大骂他的小贼行为。可男孩，依旧那么喜欢这样的女孩。他窃窃的从远处走来，灰溜溜的为女孩推着那辆没了气的自行车，任由女孩在一旁发牢骚，男孩却暗自窃喜，然后委屈的对女孩说：“对不起，我知道错了。”随即，女孩便会柔弱下来，告诉男孩下次不允许那样，男孩点头，于是，那时的他们每天都充满着笑容。

—— “对不起”的快乐 。



大学毕业后，男孩和女孩各自有了工作，男孩的工作总是很忙，有时一个月都休息不到一次，而女孩总是抱怨男孩冷落了她，终于，他们有了第一次的吵架。女孩委屈的哭起来，可男孩却很理直气壮的告诉女孩：“这是为了我的工作。”这场冷战持续了很久。终于，女孩还是忍不住，主动和男孩和好了。后来很多次男孩和女孩都因为这样的小事而吵得不可开交，可每次，都是女孩先妥协。
那年，女孩生日，男孩答应女孩要给他过一个浪漫的生日，女孩欣喜不已，她在家精心打扮，等着男孩回来陪她渡过这个美妙的生日，这一等就是凌晨，女孩在睡梦中醒来，脸上挂着泪痕，男孩见到女孩，心疼的为女孩擦去脸庞的泪痕：“对不起，嫁给我好吗？”于是男孩拿出一枚戒指。

—— “对不起”也是一种承诺。



婚后，男孩的事业大有成就，经常有许多应酬，而女孩已经成为一个专职太太了，每天在家为男孩准备热菜热饭，把家里收拾的干干净净，她经常会去菜场买回一些小河虾放在鱼缸里养着，男孩总问他为什么，女孩却总是慧心的一笑。
慢慢的，男孩每次回家，身上总是充满了不同的香水味道，而每次没等女孩问，男孩总是忙着解释说应酬太多。女孩黯然，那时起，女孩不太爱说话了，也不像以前那么开朗了，她总是喜欢成天的呆在家里，抱着枕头看韩剧，然后随着剧情哭泣，夜深时，就会疯狂的大哭。以后的日子里，男孩回来时，身上的香水味只有一种味道了，女孩从来不问，可是男孩依旧说：“对不起，今天又去应酬了。”

—— “对不起”，谎言的开始。


渐渐的，男孩开始不回家，或总是在外出差，男孩的事业越来越好，身边都是奉承的人，他每天都在别人的恭维下自豪的笑着，而女孩，几乎不出门了，她总会去超市买上很多方便面，和一些必要的日用品，然后把自己关在家里，这一呆就是很久。从前，女孩会经常和男孩一起聊聊天，而现在，她孤身一人，身边没有一个可以说话的人，每次打电话问男孩什么时候回家，男孩总是仓促的回答到：“对不起，我太忙了。”女孩，失落的扣上电话，那以后她再也没有问男孩什么时候会回家。

—— “对不起”，只是个敷衍的方式。



女孩学着电视上的样子，开始打扮自己，她觉得男孩不回家，也许是看腻了她，她决定不再颓废，自己的幸福应该靠自己争取，而不是无谓的后退。
那天，女孩心血来潮，按照地址去了男孩工作的地方，那是女孩第一次去，也是唯一的一次。女孩涩涩的按下电梯，来到这个男孩经常说忙的地方，她细细的观察这个公司的每个角落，这里的一切，她都觉得很好看。终于，绕过长长的办公走廊，她来到男孩的办公室，轻轻的推开门……女孩愣住了，眼前看到的不是自己的丈夫，也不是那个经常弄坏她自行车的那个贼小子，更不是那个把虾放在小鱼缸里的男孩，而是一个正在和别的女人做爱的男人。那个女人坐在桌子上，******的发出微弱的呻吟声，那个男人，仿佛山林里饿极了的野兽……
许久，男孩才发现了女孩，男孩惊慌失措，忙把衣裤捡起来穿好。可女孩，转身离开了。男孩飞奔出去，追着女孩，那晚，大雨袭击了整个城市。女孩不顾男孩的叫喊，径直往前跑，往回家的方向跑，男孩在女孩后面大喊：“对不起，我还是爱你的，对不起，我真的只爱你。”可女孩，始终没有听见。

—— 这样的“对不起”太伤人。


男孩一直都没有找到女孩，女孩失踪很久了。男孩的世界已经一片黑暗，无心工作，无心花天酒地，他想不到女孩可以去哪里，因为女孩没有朋友，她唯一的朋友就是男孩，男孩终日守着电话机，手机24小时不关机，怕错过了女孩的电话。这一等就是半年多。
快递为男孩送来一个盒子。
男孩打开一看，里面是许多河虾的标本，有的在树叶边休息，有的在水草里躲着，各式各样的河虾标本，旁边放着一封信。

“ 我始终没有勇气再见到你，可能是我太懦弱，也或许是我根本不想见到你，我想这些『警告：注意文明用语！』应该过的没什么两样吧，我很好，我学会了离开你怎么让自己存活，我懂得了怎样赚钱养活自己，而不用每天等着你回家，为你烧一桌热腾腾的饭菜，直到凉了也不见你的人，我的手机已经不用了，因为我已经不会再为你24小时的不关机，让自己饱受辐射的折磨。我懂得怎样去爱惜自己，珍惜自己的本来应该美好的生活。我想，我是可以忘记怎么去爱你的，因为你把我的爱弄得遍地麟伤。
离婚协议书，就压在鱼缸的底下，你签完字，按照地址给我寄过来就行了。
对不起，我想我是真的累了。”

男孩按照地址找去，他满心希望能够见到女孩，然后让女孩原谅，并且告诉女孩自己不能没有她，可是打开门的却是女孩的父亲，而女孩就站在她父亲的身后——是女孩的遗像。
女孩的父亲告诉男孩，女孩在写完这封信后，跳楼自杀了，血肉一片模糊。

—— 原来“对不起”也可以是种结束。

那一年，男孩疯了。

每个人在自己的生命里头，一定会遇到一个自己真正该珍惜的人。请你好好的珍惜那一个人，不是每一句的对不起，都可以换来每一句的没关系……千万不要辜负了自己心爱的人，那对谁，都不好……把这个故事传下去，让你的朋友们知道，不要随意地说出对不起......




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This boy and Gal known each other since young, the boy also date the gal out to the pond near the village to catch prawn..The boy will be able to catch all the prawn but the gal will go back home empty handed.. She will go back alone.. look sad.. with both eyes watery.. Before dinner..there will be a knock on her house’s door.. when she saw him.. she will tend to run.. and he will catch up with her.. tell her “I’m sorry, I’ve caught all your prawns..But now.. I put them in an aquarium for you ..” She smiled happily.. this is their process of childhood.. In a blink of eyes.. both of them grew up..

--- An innocent “ I’m sorry”

The boy will always disturb her.. caused her to feel like crying.. thn make her happy all over again.. even till both of them are grownup..
He will always release the air of her bicycle’s tyre thn hide at the corner far away.. look at her nervous expression.. wait for her call.. thn run to her and let her scold his act.. Yet, he still like her very much. He will silently carry her bike .. though she is scolding him.. he still feel happy.. thn tell her “I know is my bad.. I’m sorry..” She will thn go soft and tell him never to repeat this act again.. you can see happiness in both their eyes..

--A Happy “I’m sorry”

After graduation, both of them managed to get job, he is always busy with his work, at times he didn’t get a day off for a month. And she will get angry at him for not giving her his time. Finally, they had their first fight. She cried sadly, yet he doesn’t seems to be on the weak side and said “I’m doing all these because of my job!” This cold fight extended for sometime.. Finally, she can stand no more and went to find him. After this, both of them had a lot of fights because of small stuff.. Yet, she will always be the one to step one step back.
That year, during her birthday, he promised to give her a romantic birthday, she is waiting anxiously, putting all her best dress and makeup.. waiting for him..and this wait lasted until midnight.. when she woke up, her face covered with tears.. he wiped off her tears.. feeling heartbroken and said “ I’m sorry, marry me please?” and he handed her a ring..

--A promise to “I’m sorry”


After their marriage , his carer became stable follow by tones of meeting up with clients after office hours.. and she became a professional house wife. She will prepare all the dishes for him daily, clean the house and buy some prawn to put in the aquarium daily.. and he will wonder why she buy the prawn, she will only answer with a smile..
With the pass of time, he will always go back home with different perfume on his body.. Without waiting for her to question, he will explain that he is way too busy to meet up with different clients after office hour. She realised.. yet she remain silence. Since then, she doesn’t like to talk.. not as “happy go lucky” as she used to be, she preferred to stay at home most of the time, hug her pillow when she watch Korean movies.. and cried while she watch it.. late at night, she will cry out loud. At the later days, when he comes home, there is only one perfume on his body, she never asked, yet he will still tell her “ I’m sorry, today had to meet up with clients after office hour.”
--“I’m sorry”, Lies begin..

He started not going back home, or always had out station.. With his high post, there are tones of people around him, and he will smile proudly when they congratulate him. She, on the other hand, hardly steps out of the house, she will only go to supermarket and buy all the necessities, and locked herself in the house. This lasted for some time. She used to call him and chat, and now, she will be alone, with no one beside her. Every time when she called and ask him what time he will come back, he will answer reluctantly “I’m sorry, I’m way too busy”. She will put down the phone sadly. After this incident, she never asked him what time he will be back.

--“I’m sorry” is just another way not to answer questions asked.


She began to make up.. thinking that he's not home because he is tired of seeing the "old" her.. She decided not to make herself look like an aunt.. She should fights for her happiness.. without knowing wat is meant by gave up!

That day she went to his office.. the first time she steps to his office.. she felt bit weird to enter the place that he always claimed to be busy wrking at. She looked closely at every corner of the office.. To her, the place really does look nice. Finally, she saw his office, she opened his door silently.. and she was shocked.. the guy in his eyes.. is not his husband.. and is not the guy tat always spoil her bike.. definitely not the guy that put prawns in the small aquarium.. but is a guy making love to another gal.. She was on the table.. making "noise" and the guy is like a hungry beast..

After a long while.. he realized the gal was there.. he panicked.. picked up his attire but she left.. he was chasing her..That particular night is a raining night. She did not bother his call.. trying her very best to run as fast and as far as possible.. He cried out loud " I'm sorry.. I still love you... I'm sorry.. I really love you alone.. ".. yet, she doesn't seems to hear that..

---A "I'm sorry" that hurts ..

He tried to look for her.. but she seems to gone by the wind..He is lost.. no mood to wrk or even find other gals.. he can't seems to think of other places that she can go to.. because she had no other frens.. he is her only frens.. he stayed by his phone 24/7.. feared that she might called.. and he waited for more than half a year..

One day, there's a delivery for him- a box. He opened it anxiously and saw a lot of sample prawns resting on the leaves, hiding among the grass.. and there lies a letter for him.

" In the end, I can't find any more courage to see you once again.. I guess I'm way too coward.. or maybe I don't feel like seeing you any more.. I guess the sign of "Beware of your words" now will make no different to you anymore.. I'm doing great here. Learning a life without you around.. I learn how to earn money on my own without waiting for your return every single night.. cooking all those dishes for you and waited until it turn cold and still .. your shadow are no where to be seen.. my hand phone are no longer useful to me.. because I don't need it anymore.. as I don't have to on it 24/7.. waiting for your calls.. and tortured myself with all the radiations. I've learn how to love myself.. how to appreciate the wonderful life I supposed to be living in.. I guess.. I've forgot how to love you.. because you've made me hurt way to deep..

Our divorce agreement is on the table.. below the aquarium.. after you've signed it.. mail it to me according to the address will do.. I'm sorry.. I guess I'm really way too tired.. "

According to the address, he went to search for the gal.. he was certain that he will meet her and get her forgiveness, telling her that he can't live without her.. To his surprised, it was her dad that answered the door.. and she was standing behind her dad(which is actually her photo).

Her dad told him, after she wrote the letter to him, she committed suicide- jumped down from building and there were blood all over it..

--A "sorry" can also means the end of everything..


Moral of the story: Everyone will have their chance to meet the one that will really appreciate us. Please appreciate wat this one do.. Though a sorry seems very magical.. yet, not all "I'm sorry" can be followed by "It's ok...".. Never let your beloved one regret loving you.. Never say "I'm sorry" when you don't meant it at all.. Never said I'm sorry for nothing..