Tears..

Tears.. when tis is mentioned.. most ppl will think of one cry because of sadness.. for my case.. yes.. I never cry because of happiness because.. and if one day.. I cried because of happiness.. my hope will be.. there will be people around me that I can share my happy tears with..

Let me tell u something : I wish to influence others with my smile.. and will keep my sadness to myself.. and will only let it go in the middle of the night.. when I'm all alone. this is me..so. How to define happiness? someone with a smile? yes and no.. in my case.. a smile will not define happy.. this mask of mine.. only those dear to me.. will sense something wrong.. other thn tat.. my mask will do well enough to cover my feelings..

At times, I' tired of this mask.. but without it.. I will feel insecure.. I've heard once that.. those that look strong.. there are actually much weaker thn those who look soft and weak.. maybe.. I'm really not as strong as I looked.. at times, I do admire those gal that can cry out loud.. because it seems that.. I do not have the privilege of doing so.. it seems like.. tears can only be seen in the middle of night when I can only feel no other thn myself..

The thing about tears is.. when you are still crying.. meaning.. you cared.. but if.. one day.. no more tears falling down ur cheek.. it means.. everything is over.. you have grow from sad to disappointed.. frm disappointment to.. give up??..

Found some songs related to tears.. this is one new version about tears..

溫嵐 - 眼淚知道



and this is one old song.. but really nice. try to listen to wat they think about tears?

范曉萱-眼淚(tears)

Stories of its own..

Ever heard of this phrase "There is always a woman behind every successful man"? Yes.. no doubt..there is always a story behind one successful man.. a story that keeps him striving hard to reach his gold.. a source that keeps him motivated and keeps on going despite all the failure and all the rough paths.. the woman can be his beloved one.. or even his mom.. or maybe his daughter?.. one that always understand him.. will still stand by him even though she knows clearly that he can hardly have time for her.. being this "understanding".. is somehow extraordinary.. yet.. she managed to stand by him and be supportive..Have u ever wonder.. will the guys actually think that.. it is a duty of the woman to do so? Will the guys actually take this type of "understanding" for granted and see it as a "must" for each and every woman to do so for the guys?


Let me tell you something guys.. NO!! This is NOT the DUTY of the female to do so!!but if they decided to do that for u .. congrat!! you are one lucky guy!! but if they failed to do so.. maybe you should have a second thought.. that maybe .. somewhere in the middle of the path.. did u somehow.. forgot their existence and so.. it is somehow.. not their fault but ur fault?? right?

Ok.. let's turn the story the other way round.. have you ever wonder.. why so many successful women nowadays stay single? or maybe.. you hardly hear the phrase of " There is a man behind every successful woman" ? no no.. i don't mean no at all.. there are such story that I've heard.. and even see with my bare eyes.. but as compared.. the percentage.. is so much lower as compared to those single one.. why? that.. let's ask the guys.. First and for most.. can you guys handle the truth that.. your gal is earning more than you? will you feel bit offended or uncomfortable? From wat I see.. most of you will feel uncomfortable.. because of your egoism ? Heh.. let's think it the other way round.. can u see or even take your egoism to buy something like maybe a nice house or even a bread? No? ok.. but with the extra money earned from the higher paid.. you can buy breads.. or even houses.. so.. which is better?

Yes.. I know we woman have always be the known as the "understanding" one.. Traditionally,woman has to wait for the her guy to come bck from home no matter how late it is.. and they are bck.. your face should not turn "dark" when you face them.. but in stead.. with a smile.. and maybe prepare supper for them? Very much ideal ?!.. Well.. guys.. I said TRADITIONALLY ?hahaha.. ok.. If we turn this story the other way round.. If his girl come home from wrk late at night.. do you think you guys can actually wait for her to come home with a smile.. and maybe massage for her after a long tiring day of work ?.. Can you actually be understanding enough to bare with the truth that.. she is working so much harder to earn money for this family that she might have that much time for u ?.. Can you guys be "understanding"?

I have been wrking lately at Cosway owned by a woman.. she has a family..and I categorized her as one successful woman because she owned 2 Cosway shops.. in the same time, I pity her.. Despite being so busy and stress at work.. she has to face alot of unnecessary stress from her family- her not- understanding husband. Can you imagine.. when she is handling so many customers at wrk.. and she handle it with a smiles on her face... a moment later.. at the store room.. while talking to her husband on phone.. she is facing him with tears.. If he can be bit more understanding.. if one man can understand how hard it is to be a wrking woman and also a wife.. finding a balance point of both is hard enough.. what more if you are tryin so so hard to giv in both.. and the other one failed to see it and insisted for more.. you get wat i mean ?!..

I'm not saying that.. all guys are not understanding.. but what I'm trying to say or asking for is.. please try to be understanding.. being a woman is hard enough.. as a working woman.. we faced most of the problem like a working man .. but wat more is.. we will have to face the risk of harassment.. imagine yourself working so so hard at wrk.. and when u reach home.. you will want a place where you know you can finally have some peace and a place to rest and "recharged" right? We hope for the same.. but for a working woman with family.. they faced the risks of having a not so understanding husband that might cont. to giv u a hard time until maybe you fall asleep.. sad case? yes.. and this is why most of the successful woman stay single? maybe.. so.. who to blamed? you tell me.. maybe .. and maybe.. if guys can help his gal to find a balance point by motivating her, supporting her.. and maybe be bit more understanding.. everyone can stay happy? maybe.. or maybe you can tell me your point of views of all these??

Yesterday

Yesterday what happened? anyone can recall it? maybe to most of u.. ur memory of this yesterday still kinda fresh.. but what happened to your yesterday's yesterday? The same thing might occurred to a bunch of u.. but the yesterday that u remembered and felt might varies accordingly..

U can take away your yesterday from ur memory.. but u can never take away one's yesterday by asking them to forget about it.. it is just like.. emmm.. u can never ask someone to stop hating u because u wan them to do so.. everything happens for a reason.. the reason for them to hate u.. or love is.. doesn't come from one day or two.. it happened because of something u did.. by purpose or accident.. the yesterday that u remembered might just be a small issue to u.. but it might be a huge issues to others...

However, I'm glad of who I'm today for what ever that happened yesterdays.. I know at times life is hard on me.. and I've been going through each and everyday with a hope that tomorrow will be a better day..we can decide our tomorrow.. but we can change nothing of what that had happened.. we can't change yesterday...I always believe that everything happens for a reason.. and it is to taught us and so.. .. let's make our tomorrow a better day based on what we learn from "yesterday"?

A great son sang by Leona Lewis.. I dedicate to all of u .. hope you all will enjoyed it.


Yesterday by Leona Lewis

TANK - 專屬天使，如果我變成回憶，全世界都停電

I know I have not been updating my blog for few days d.. miss me? hahaha.. tat's y I'm gonna intro tis 3 songs all together today..

As Wat I've said before.. every songs has a story.. and this song has a story itself.. or at least.. it will remind me of a story of mine.. I have not been hearing tis song for sometime.. because it will remind me of someone.. the title of this song, "Angle of Mine"..

“我不会怪你对我的伪装，天使在人间是该藏好翅膀， 人们愚蠢鲁莽而你纤细善良，怎能让你 为了我被碰伤。。。”
This are the first few line of the lyrics.. "I will not blame u for pretending, angels should hide their wings when they are around mankind, humans have always been careless and reckless but u have been kind and careful, how can I let u get hurt because of me... "enough to touch me..


I'm sure people from all around the world have been trying really hard to find angel that belong to themselves.. angels that are in disguised.. angel that belong to ones, right? Are you angel of mine? Am I angel of yours? Will you be mine and mine alone? I have no idea why.. almost every time when I listen to this song, my eyes will be filled with tears.. maybe .. if u listen to this song closed enough.. u might just understand wat I meant by all these..

TANK - 專屬天使



Second song by Tank, "If I become memory"..Have u ever wonder if.. one day u become a part of a memory of someone that meant alot to u ? He sang out it out loud..
"..如果我变成回忆 退出了这场生命,留下你坐挨哭泣,我冰冷身体 拥抱不了你
想到我让深爱的你仍还孤独旅行 我会恨自己 如此狠心.

如果我变成回忆 终于没那么幸运,没机会白着头发 满山牵着你 看晚霞落去, 漫长时光总有一天你会伤心痊愈 , 若有人可以 让他给你 我不怪你.

如果我变成回忆 最怕我单独终极 ,顽固的烂在空气 不整理心里每一寸空隙 ,原来依然爱我的你总哭 承受失去 ,这样不公平 请你整理 把我忘记...."

" If I become apart of ur memory, quit from this life, left u alone cryin over my cold body, unable to hug u close to me, thinking of leaving my beloved u alone on this journey of life, I will hate myself for bein this cruel..

If I become apart of ur memory, being so unlucky, not being able to grow old with u, holding ur hand to see the sunset.. one day, your wounds will cured and sadness will grow apart, if there is someone that can give u all these, please allow him to stay by u, I will not blame u for that..

If I become apart of ur memory, afraid of loneliness,refuse to tidy up all those feeling,at that moment, realised that u still loved me so, crying, and accepting all these lost, this is so not fair, please tidy up ur feelin, and forget about me... "
Tank - 如果我變成回憶


This is another new song by Tank, "Black out around the world".
When you are shut down by someone so dear to ur heart.. this will be the song that tell ur story.. because u will feel so alone.. no matter how hard u tried to call out loud that u miss this someone, no one will hear it.. being disappointed to the max, u will start to get tired.. Try to listen to this song.. and tell me.. do u feel wat I felt? do u feel wat he felt, black out around the world..
TANK-全世界都停電

方炯鑌(阿鑌) - 壞人

First sighted love.. this is the only words I can described when I first heard this song, " Bad guy".. I like a song for many reason.. but most of all.. It sang out my thoughts.. my feeling.. and so.. it can tell my story well..

This is a story about a guy that loved a gal very much.. but he had to let her go to find her happiness.. because clearly, it is not with him. In order to let her go, he had to be the bad guy. In life, there are tones of stuff that are out of our control.. we can't decide who to be..but we can decide wat we can do. We can never change people's perception towards things..but we know clearly wat we are doing might not be wat they see it to be. Just like this story, he had to be mean to let her giv up on him. To her, he is no doubt the bad guy! But, from wat I see, he is the good guy that willing to hurt himself to see her happy in days to come. Good or bad? happy or sad.. it is more of a self- perception.. don't judge a person's act because of wat u think he is... Agreed?

太委屈 - 陶晶瑩

Today, after so long.. I actually feel like wat this song sang.. "太委屈".. no.. I'm not depressed or emo because of a relationship.. but because I was drag into a "fire" without being realised.. I did nothing wrong..and was being "slap" so hard that I can barely think.. I know well that I was not asleep with ever decision I made.. and I know well that every action has its reaction.. and so I take my steps with much consideration.. but there are people that do or even say things without much consideration.. and not even bother who they might hurt..what else can I say??..

FIR-天天夜夜 / Trisha Yearwood - How Do I live

As requested by one of my fren, she wished to hear tis song sang by FIR.. and so.. I put both Chinese and English version.. I like this 2 version alot.. I hope you guys will like it too !!

天天夜夜 - FIR





How Do I Live - Trisha Yearwood

承诺不代表永远 , Promises ≠ forever

I came across this message the other day.. and it somehow touched my heart.. if only more people realised what is the actual meaning of promises.. If you know me well enough.. you will know that I don do much promises.. because I know promise is a strong word.. this is the chinese version.. and I will try to translate it in English .

一天，在车上女孩问男孩。。

女孩：我美丽吗？

男孩：还好！

女孩：。。。。
女孩又问：如果有天有别的男生要追求我，你会怎样？

男孩：没怎样！

女孩很生气，她觉得男孩根本都不爱她！
女孩最后问男孩：你会爱我多久？一年，十年？还是永远？

男孩沉默了。。。他没回答女孩。。一直驾着车！
女孩心碎了，她知道男孩不爱她了。。男孩也不曾给过自己什么承诺！这是，男孩把车停一旁！

男孩对女孩说: 你不美，但在我心中你永远最美！ 如果有男生要追求你，我不会怎样，因为那时你的选择！如果你答应了，就证明你不再爱我了，就算我生气也没用！我不保证会爱你多久，不能说是一年，也不能说是十年，更不能说是永远！我可以给你的答案是：我会爱直到你不爱我的那一天！

女孩哭了，她生气为什么自己不相信男孩！
女孩抱着男孩说：。。。 对不起。。。。

男孩不给女孩承诺，不是因为不爱她而是他害怕自己实现不了，让女孩难过！

[承诺不代表永远。。。]
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One day, while in the car, a gal ask her boy,

Gal : Am I pretty?

Boy: So so..

Gal : ....
Gal continue to ask: If it comes a day where there is another guy go after me, what will you do ?

Boy: I'll do nothing!

The gal start to get really angry.. thinking that the boy doesn't even love her!
The gal wanna asked him the last question in her mind : How long will you love me? 1 year? ten years? or forever?

The boy remain silent.. concentrating in his driving without answering her question.
She is heart broken, confirming that he don't love her any more.. He never promised her anything.. not before and not now.

The boy stopped his car aside, look into her eyes and tell her : You are not pretty, but in my heart, you will forever be the prettiest of all! If ever any guy go after you, I will do nothing, because it is your call! If you agreed, it will only mean that you don't love me anymore, hence, there is no use of me being angry! I cant promised you how long I'll love you.. not a year, not ten years and not even forever. What I can tell you is , I will love you until the day you don't love me anymore... !

The gal burst in tears.. regretting for not trusting him!
She hugged him and said.: ... I'm sorry..

The boy never promised her anything, not because he does not love her. He feared that he can't hold his promises.. making the gal experience even more pain.

___________________________________________________________________

This is a meaningful story.. at least i think so.. promises are meant to be hold.. and kept.. but most people promised for the sake of promise.. and not because they meant it.. which will bring more harm than happiness? To me, Promise is a strong word.. and so.. don't promise when you have no faith in keeping them.. promise when you mean it.. and keep your promises!!

Love is..

I got tis forward email not that long ago.. and I actually think it is meaningful and decided to post it here.

What is love to most of you?! untouchable? unreacheable? .. Some people feel that.. love meant forever.. and forever is always so so so far away.. I never promise forever.. because.. I have no idea where is forever.. and I so.. I'm unable to promise forever.. I cannnot predict things to last forever.. because.. I can not definite forever..

I remembered once .. National Geo. "definited" love biologically.. as a hormon in our body.. when you feel like you are in love, it is the hormon in your body that are doing the reaction of increased heartbeat .. blushed when you see this someone.. maybe the feeling of missing this someone too.. but the sad thing is.. this hormon will only last for about 2 year.. after that.. you might feel that.. you have less interest in this someone.. and that is when you start to feel that you are not so much in love in this someone? ? But why people still stay together even after 2 years? After you read this.. I seriously hope anyone of you will not use this "hormon issue thing" to be a reason to breakup with someone..When you are in love, you are supposed to build a relationship upon it.. to trust tis someone.. to care for this someone.. not because of this hormon issue.. but because you really wanna care for this someone.. intent to build a world.. build your world with this someone around.. and this is why this hormon for? What do you have to say for love?

Rebecca- age 8:
'When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore.
So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love.'

Billy - age 4:
'When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different.
You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.'

Chrissy - age 6:
'Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.

Terri - age 4:
'Love is what makes you smile when you're tired...”

Danny - age 7:
'Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.

Emily - age 8:
'Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more.
My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss'

Bobby - age 7 :
'Love is what's in the room with you as if you stop opening presents and listen.'

Nikka - age 6:
'If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,”

Noelle - age 7:
'Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.'

Tommy - age 6:
'Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.

Cindy - age 8:
'During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling.

He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore.'

Clare - age 6:
'My mommy loves me more than anybody,You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.

Elaine-age 5:
'Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken..'

Chris - age 7:
'Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford”

Mary Ann - age 4:
'Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.'
Lauren - age 4:
'I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.'

Karen - age 7:
'When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.'

Mark - age 6:
'Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross.'

Jessica - age 8:
'You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it... But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.'

And the final one
The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife.
Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there.
When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said,'Nothing, I just helped him cry'

... After reading all these, I know most people build love with promises.. but the truth is, promises do not last forever.. because we tend to forget what we have promised.. however, if you build love with care, honesty and most of all.. with your heart.. it might just be forever?!.. don't ask me when is forever.. you tell me.. how long is forever? and where is forever? ..

From old blog : A letter for cactus

I know cactus always seems to be one ugly looking and maybe "harmful" plant.. I on the other hand have a different perspective of cactus.. in fact, I admire cactus.. how it tried to protect itself.. and how tough it is to survive in this world.. and hopefully.. I can be as strong as cactus..

April 23rd, 2009

仙人掌，

我其实明白的苦，有时，我也感觉我几乎和你拥有同样的宿命。。或许，我也该称自己为仙人掌？

我知道，我和你相比，简直是小巫见大巫，怎么能比呢？可，为何，我明了你的心声呢？为何我知道你可怕的外表其实，是长年累积的压抑。。我也感觉到，你身上长满的刺，其实非你所爱，可，这伤痕是你拥来提醒自己，不能再为他人自造同样的伤，其实，把话说透`， 是为了自我保护。。在这花花世界里，不想再为不必要的伤而伤？所以，你显得那么的可怕？可，我何尝不是吗？知我者，或许知道，我没想像的可怕，可不知我 者，。。我无话可道。。因为，我没必要为解释而解释。。只是，在无人岛上，这仙人掌深知的是，被人憎恨的刺，这刺，生长在你身上，其实，何尝的不疼，其 实，你也不希望拥有这刺是吧？其实，更不渴望会在伤害他人时更深的伤害自己。。只是，这是你的宿命，你，又有什么权力抗拒又有什么权力将这心声道出呢？你 深知的是，尚若没道过的心声，永远都只是心声，你也不硬碰他人而造成不必要的伤害。。是的，这样是假装。。听来是万分的讽刺，如果能假装得毫无痕迹，如果 我真的毫无感觉的就像仙人掌般，或许我根本不会认识什么是眼泪。。所以，仙人掌，我没权力去冒充是你，因为，我拥有权力道出我的疼，而我所看透的你，是真 的如此吗？我已好久好久没道出所承受的疼痛，一直压抑着，是不是，我也渴望有一天，真的能成为你所拥有的程度呢？不，其实，我清楚地知道，这伪装，很假我 知道，但，承得很苦，而在还未像泡沫般破灭而永远消失前，我想对仙人掌说，我会学着你的坚强，学着你的勇敢，我会将不为人知的永远的让它不为人知。。这样 的伪装。。仙人掌，你是否准许我不诬赖你的，继续盗用你的名誉，为我自己创下我的名堂呢？

你永远的学徒

From old blog : 等待

Somehow, I actually think this is still very much true.. this is something I have written in 2006, about waiting.. it is long.. yet people will want to wait.. it's heart breaking yet people seems to have faith in waiting.. but in the end of the day.. waiting.. it is just a time frame given to people.. so much so that they have to courage to let go and are able to tell the world " I've waited, and i left with no regret.. ".. at least this is what I think.. my my.. I never know I was good in these back thn.. but too bad.. I don't think I can write such thing no more.. somehow.. lost d.. hahaha.. Anyway.. I hope you will like it..

等待,
是如此的漫长,却又如此的期盼..
曾经,
有人这么说,
因为有所期盼,才会有所等待,
因为有所等待..才会有所失望..
有人用了一生,
期盼着真爱会伴随终生..
但,
最终..孤寂却成了最好不过的朋友

等待,
是如此的折磨,却又如此的现实…
有人愿用一生的时间,
等待着一场动人的故事发生在自己身上..
然而,
却无法从梦里警醒..无法面对这现实的世界..

“请你一定要等我..”
这句多么浪漫的话..
有多少人会溶化在这话下..
但,
又有多少人明了..
这是句如此残酷的话..
用句话及信任来以时间交换..
有多少人真的能做到呢??

等待,
让人能真实的面对人生..
等待,
让人看清人的真面目..
时间的考验,
让人明了,
人永远都是自私的??!!
永远都盼望等待的他人?!
永远期盼牺牲的是她人?!

曾经,
等待,
却又从等待中领悟..
原来,等待是不会有所结果..
不愿再等待了?!
等得累了?!
成了一阵不为任何人停留的风?!
却又注定成为孤独的阵风??!!

等待,
原来是给自己一段时间
让你我懂得如何放手..
等待着自己能从新将心门打开..
等待着..

From old blog : IF

Came across this yesterday.. and I realised.. I was really kind of an emo gal bck thn.. always keep things on my own.. refusing to let anyone enter my world.. with the fear that once a world is build with them around.. if they ever leave, my world will collapse.. so, I shielded myself.. with a mask so that all those negative feelings will not be identified..

May 23rd, 2008

If heart is
meant to be broken, then, so far, how many hearts have I broken?? Or I should
rephrase my sentence, how many times have I break my heart?

If the
furthest distance is you not knowing I love you despite me standing just in
front of you, then what’s the nearest distance?

If you feel
sad when tears is all over your face, tell me how to describe when you hold
your tears and letting it drip only in your heart?

If smile is
the way to “deliver” happy, it’s there any specific definition for “happy”?

If the
nearest distance is when I look into your eyes, then, how far is the distance
if I failed to see “me” in your eyes?

If “lonely”
is the word to describe when you are all alone, then how do you describe when you are feeling all alone when you are hanging
a group of people?

If just
when I try to build my world with you around, will I start to get hurt too??

If a world is build wit you around, how long can
it hold??

If it is
hard to trust for the only unchangeable is change itself, then, when will you
start to change if I’ve start to trust you ?

If there is no more lies,

No lies will be needed to cover the first lie
and that you will not loss your faith in trusting people..
and you will not have to wonder which is the truth from all the lies..

If and only if...

Man Vs Female..

Well, all the good part of human being, I'm sure most of you have realised it.. and over and over again.. we are advised to look at one's beauty instead of the ugly side.. to avoid conflicts and stuff.. but the truth is, the more you tried to hide.. avoid discussing will not solve the problem.. will only make misunderstanding become a major issue in days to come.. right?

Like my previous post, I actually feel like discussing gender issues.. We female, maybe to some guys.. are that brilliant. We tend to be a little bit too "understanding", a little bit too "ok" with everything.. and a little bit too " able to give in"? Why makes me say so? ok.. imagine this.. you are married to someone which give birth to a child.. which are not that perfect and actually need your care for his entire life. Ok, I know this is hard enough d.. but this is a true story that the wife actually passed away when the kid is less than 7 years old. In other words, the husband has to take care of the kid for the rest of his life.. alone.. while working..this is a sad story.. ya.. i know.. but in this case.. while I was discussing with my mom and asked her, "do you think he will get married again?" (since he is still young, at his early 30 s') .. she looked at me.. and I got the answers d.. the truth is, if his son is normal, most probably ya.. because he is still young and kinda good looking. But, how many woman can stand to take care of a child for the rest of their life.. which is not her child ? .. another question pops up:" Will he really stay single just because of this child?" In years to come, it is really hard to predict..

If this situation had a turn.. meaning, the guy passed away leaving the female living and had to take care of the son for the rest of her life. The tendency of her staying single just to take care of this kid is higher than the male right? so, does this mean that, in general, I mean in general and no one in specific, females are more "generous, forgiving" than males?

Like what I've discussed in previous post, when a male had an affair, you will see the % of the wife trying to forgive the husband so much more than husband forgiving wife.. right? This does not show females are so much more stupid than man !! no !! we female are not dumb! the reason for doing so?Because most of them are generous at least much more than male.. However, I guess I'm not as generous as most female.. i can't stand betrayal.. not even a single lie.. so, please don't lie to me..If you refuse to tell me anything, just tell me, don't lie. I will not force if you are not comfortable with.. because I believe when you are ready to tell, you will tell even without asking, right ?

So, you tell me, female are more generous than male? maybe not that much.. but as compared, female are bit more generous to male ?

Frm old blog : Men are just risk taker or they are just short sighted？！

For those that have known me for sometimes would have know that I have a blog before this.. Today I accidentally oversee the link and so.. I've decided to import some of the nice post to share with you guys.. and I actually hope you all will post comments on..

January 8th, 2008


曾经。。有人道过“。。。男人一生什么对他而言最重要呢？是家庭吗？是 实力还是钱财？。。。这都不是！！是欲望！！。。。”很惊讶吗？可我相信你我身旁明显有了这样的例子。。只是。。你我都选择不去猜想。。不去明白。。怎么 说呢？？我国领袖最近的丑闻有了最好的例子！试问身旁的任何女士，你能为了欲望放弃家人。。放弃你枕边人，放弃你孩子，放弃跟随你打拚十几二十年的人。。 只为了更新更美更新鲜的人？？这是见新忘旧。。可各位女士你愿意吗？或许你也愿意吧。。但自今，我相信你听说过为了家庭放弃一切的女人吧。。。她可以忍受 一切难听的话，一切的泪一切的苦，换来的是孩子的一笑。但，尚若这种的故事听换了主角，`把“她”换成“他”，那你又否听说过呢？或许真的有。。可相比之 下呢？？我身边的人也有着这样的故事，他为了一位情妇将车卖了，希望的是家人能接受她，太太能了解他！可，这未免太幻想了！世上有多少女人真的能做到呢？ 结果，太太要求离婚，不再让他见孩子而情妇也离他而去，从此都不想再见他。试问两头不到岸的感觉如何呢？可为何在一切还未开始时，男人，你是否想过会有这 样的结局？现在一闹二自杀又有何用？你只会让身边曾伴随你的女人嘲笑，庆幸放弃了你。至少现在的生活，不需再看你脸色而活。试想着，这若发生在女方呢？我 相信世上的人都会臭骂她！可为何，男人可能被谅解，可女方呢？这又何等的公平？男人，为了欲望，可以放弃几十年打拼下的家庭。放弃家人，甚至放弃儿 女。。。为的是一位甚至能当他女儿的女人。我好想设问“男人，那你太太呢？同你打拚这么久的女人，为你已成黄脸婆的她又在哪儿？”好想明白，在他还未决定 “下手”时，他的想法真的只有“想吃”眼前的美人？还是有为前途着想呢？单纯的为欲望？！没深刻了解后果吗？那，我该说“。。。men are risk taker or they are just short –sighted??唉。。。可恶的欲望。。。因为男人最终会以“。。我错了。。原谅我。。这世上谁没犯过错呢？。。我答应。。不会有下次。。从此只对你 一人。。。”或许`太太会原谅。。也或许会看在孩子份上。。原谅相信他。可，谁能担保，这真的会是最后一次，或许，我该这么道，又有谁能担保，以上的“原 谅稿”他只会说一次，只会向你一人道呢？？你又否能确定你会是第一也是最后呢？？相信没人能肯定！但爱情有着美妙的魔咒-信任。这一切让所有可能发生的悲 剧成了不可能。让一切不可能的成可能发生的喜事！！但，这不是三两天就能建立的！所以，尚若你真的拥有了它，请你务必要好好地保留保管它。。别让它流失。 因为，它，一旦走了可能这辈子都不会到会！它也可能成了自命的一伤。。。

I Will Be - Avril Lavigne

I tried to find the MV.. but too bad.. this is the best I can get.. and frankly speaking.. I initially intended to get Leona Lewis version.. but I get nothing better than this.. so.. I decided to put Avril Lavigne's version.

I overheard this song when I was in the car few days ago.. and I felt that I have to put it here and share it with you guys.. I hope you will like it too

Happy birthday !

Yes.. Happy birthday.. but not to me.. to my beloved sister, Hui Sin. Today is her day.. but sadly.. she is not with me.. not currently in Melaka as she is stuck in Shah Alam.. but I'm as her "caring and understanding" sister.. as usual, I will be the reminder of my whole family this important day of hers..

I understand how it felt to be alone.. to be this someone that people can hardly recall and for people to forget some important days that you hope people will remembered because they want to remember.So, I will have to try my best to make sure this horrible feeling will not hunt her..

Well.. I don really think you will visit my blog.. but if you ever do.. I want you to know.. though we are not around you on this special day, I hope you will still feel warm with our wishes.. Happy 19th Birthday !!

林俊傑 - 害怕 & Endless Road

Yes.. JJ's songs again.. but you know what.. if you are a big fan of his.. you will know this 2 songs are actually the same.. same as in.. "Endless Road" is actually the English version of his "害怕" .. I hope you all will like it as much as I do..


林俊傑 - 害怕

林俊傑 - Endless Road

林俊杰 - 大男人小女孩 & 會有那麼一天

JJ, one of my favorite artist.. he can really sing.. and I love his voice.. just that.. well, I still prefer his old songs compared to his new songs.. These 2 songs I used to love alot.. and it is not really sad songs..at least I think so..

This first song, it is about a "big guy & small girl".. "big guy" as in.. well, most of the guys.. will think what ever they said are always right.. and do not want to admit they are wrong.. always want to be in charge of everything.. this is the guy he tried to describe in his song.. and the girl that will always have to be understanding.. but all she needs is to be understood too.. to be loved and cared for.. listen to the song.. and you will know.. are you the "big guy" or the "small girl"?

林俊杰-大男人小女孩

This second song.. " This day will come", is actually the first song that introduced JJ to me.. It is really a sweet song.. about the world war that separated this old man (granddad) from hid beloved one (grandma )when they are still young.. before he leave for the war.. he give her a kiss and told her " I'm leaving but don't be cry.. don be sad and please believed in me, wait for my love which will accompany you forever, because the day will come where we will hold hands together and walk on this field.. listen to the birds singing.. and listen to me saying I love you all over again.. ".. If this is really real.. this shows how strong love can be.. how sweet love will bring joy to ones life.. and by listen to this song.. it might just make u believe all these..

林俊傑 － 會有那麼一天

Hands..

The other day when I was chatting with my mom, she told me something really funny about a kid in her kindergarten. When she was teaching them about the uses of our legs.. spontaneously, one of the naughty student answered her "legs can be used to kick people!".. I seriously have no idea how kids "evolved".. how can an innocent kid turn into so violent? The truth is, we used legs to walk our "desired" paths.. to be who we are today.. and to be the one that we hope we will be.. at least this is what I think..

The use of hand? we can create something of out it.. and in the same time, one bad thought, one bad move.. we can destroy something or even someone out of it.. but the truth is, have you ever had a deep though of the wonders of your hands?

When we were just a kid.. a hand is what we need for assurance.. for a sign of "it is ok and safe to go ahead" because we know clearly.. with our small hand.. there will always be this big hand that will hold tightly to ours on our every steps..


As we grow bit older,when we start to make friends.we will know that where ever we go.We are not alone.Because they will be someone that will accompany us through each steps too. Even when we know that we might fall, we know that we are never alone and that it is ok to be afraid.. because there is always someone that are afraid too.


When we are old enough to know and love someone other than our family, hands is what that will make each other feel secured. When you are lost, we will need each others hand to guide you out. Someone used to tell me this: There is a reason why god created human with gap between our fingers, as there will be this someone's fingers that will fit perfectly.

Have you found this someone? I remembered few years back when I was working in a shop while waiting for my result. I saw this one old couple that touched my heart so so deeply.. Frankly speaking, how often do you see old couple holding hands when they are out shopping? I hardly even see married couples holding hands.. what more old couples?

Yes, at the beginning when you had been with this someone for the first few years.. you will try your best to hold her hands so tight just to make you feel that she will stick and be with you where ever you go.. but as time goes by, you will "conveniently" forget her presence.. you might even start to take things for granted.. start to feel bored with her on your every sight..and maybe this is another reason married couples hardly hold hands when they are out? because they are too convenient with the current situation that they might have forgotten what it was like to hold each others hand, to assure that things will be ok?

I once discuss this issue with someone.. and somehow make this someone made a promise.. that he will have to remember to hold the hand of his special one no matter how old they are.. I know it is somehow a stupid promise.. and a stupid act.. but seriously.. it is not something that they should be ashamed of.. The miracle of one's hand can affect the other one.. Maybe it might not be this someone special.. but you remembered this someone that guide you through your first walk? this someone that assure you that it is ok to continue to walk even after you have fall for few times in your life? Bare in mind that one day, this someone will need you to guide them through their life when they are can bare walk, can barely see without their glasses.. Maybe it is time for you to holg their hands.. to assure them that.. it is ok to continue walking.. becuase you will be there holding their hands through their steps of life.. and so.. will you do so ?! Will you promise me that you will continue to hold the hand of this special one in your life regardless of how old you have become?!

Bukit Beruang Night Market (Pasar Malam on Wednesday)

Sorry guys for not updating my blog.. I was kinda busy.. busy watching series.. haha..but you know what.. since some of you not really a big fans of "Melaka", I actually intended to introduce Melaka Night Market to all of you..

Well, the first thing that cross my mind was.. FOODS!! haha.. well, I know, unlike KL's night market.. I went there few times, I can hardly walk.. but in Melaka, you are rest assure that you can really have most of the space to walk. In fact, if you want to dance in the middle of the road.. be my guess.. I actually doubt you will have much problem. No no.. I'm not saying that no one actually go for the night market, and in fact, lots of MMU students go there dating and stuff.. but that is not the point of this post.

I actually feel like I have to let you guys know the nice stuff when you are go for this night market. I have even captured some photos of the "special" foods that you actually have to wait for your turn. At times, when you are in "bad luck" you have to wait for about half an hour to get the food you want.

Ok.. cut the story and get to the point. The first food is "Jeli Madu Ai Yee" that was once really "famous" and somehow a must buy when you come to night market. It actually cost RM1.50


And right beside this stall.. is a "forever" famous pop corn stall. I remembered once.. I actually have to wait for more than half an hour for this pop corn. How special is this pop corn ? for a start, it cost me Rm1 for a pack.. and it is sweet.. and actually taste nice.. the most part of the story.. well.. when a stall is full of poeple.. it speaks for itself.. and you just have to taste for youself to judge it right?


Well, not very far away from this stall, there is this "chicken chop" that I found in KL first before I found it here in Melaka. Well, I would say that.. it is not really that cheap. It will cost around RM5.50 for one I think .. but you know what.. the smell of it when they are frying it.. makes you feel that you just have to taste it... if you were there.. you will know what I meant.


Somewhere opposite this stall, you will find this "pair" of people selling this special cakes.. yes.. I meant it when I said special because .. well, there are few types of cakes. You can even see kiwi cake which.. is one of my favourate when I'm out to this night market, accompanying my mom. It cost about RM6.50 if i'm not mistaken.
A must buy when I visited this night market are the following

This is Penang Laksa and the photo on the right is rojak. This penang laksa actually cost me RM3.20 and this rojak cost me RM3.. but well.. It worth my money.. because .. I actually enjoyed eating them.. Talk about Penang Laksa.. I actually remembered this someone promised or at least to bring me one from Penang.. but.. I guess I will have to wait.. until when ? hahaha.. that is not an answer for me. Well, I actually have to wait for more than half an hour for these foods. Ya.. I know.. this rojak don't really look delicious.. but trust me.. it actually taste really really good ans that is why when people buy.. usually they will buy more than 1 pack.

While I was hunting for foods, I came across this drink Honey Drew Sago which actually taste kind of ok .. and it cost me around RM 1.80. Ya.. I know.. for KL.. this is cheap.. but when you are in Melaka.. this is not in the really cheap category. I managed to capture a clear picture of it..

Last but not least, the photo of how this night market looks like when it is at night..

Do you have any other thoughts of this night market or any other night market you've been to ?? Well, do post some comments if you do..

Music and I..

Yes.. this is the question pops up when I was chatting with my friend the other day.. we used to studied in the same class for about 2 years when we were in form 6.. the funny thing is.. I was always the quiet one.. hardly even talk.. and we hardly know each other.. until we finished form 6.. then only we get to know each other closer.. I never know he is good with piano.. and he even joined a band in USM.. and the Neng that I remembered.. a funny guy.. and always tease me.. and a smart guy too..have always been a great fren.. someone you can rely on when you need a fren..

The funny part is.. just like me.. we have lost touched with our form 6 friend.. that is why I actually hesitated whether to join the "gathering" at Teng's house the other day.. because I hardly even contacted them after our form 6.. we are in totally different life now.. I'm in business field.. and others.. most of them are in engineering course. half way through now.. Well, at times of life.. I will certainly miss Jas Min alot.. and also .. Siow Wei.. who sit right beside me.. I don't tlak much .. but I know they are those that I can rely on when I needed s hand to help me out.. I was never the smart one in the class..and they are those that will help me out when I almost give up.. but we are so far apart now.. my hope.. we will still keep in touch.. although once in a blue moon.. that is good enough for me.. at he very least.. i will know that.. I'm remembered..

My form 6 life.. is really a tough journey..but I'm really glad i walk through that.. with my heads up.. at least when I look back now.. I have no regret.. I get to know some great frens.. and while I was struggling to walk through the path.. musics is always there to accompany me.. I can't imagine myself without music.. yes.. as what I told Neng.. every music has its story.. that is why.. at times when I listen to music.. tears will starts to roll down.. "I feel music".. that's what Neng told me.. and I told him.. every music has its story.. you will just have to find the music that tell your story.. and you will experience what I'm experiencing..I feel music.. because they are telling my story..and that is why I always post some nice music here..

Neng managed to find himself when he is with music.. when he is with his band.. that is his home.. where he belong to music.. and what is my hobby? I guess I managed to find myself.. when I'm here.. blogging.. expressing myself.. even though I know not many will visit my blog.. but I still continue.. with the hope that.. I will continue to get supports from all of you.. but as what Neng told me.. " you will do best when you are doing what you like ".. well.. maybe.. ya.. maybe no.. but at the very least.. I found myself when I'm here.. where are you now? I hope you are not lost.. and will managed to find a place.. where you can find yourself..