At times, I will wonder.. will I ever feel contended with all that I have? I know what I have is not much.. but is it enough for me? The truth is, we human will never be satisfy with what we have.. maybe this does not apply to all beings.. but, to most of us.. it is applicaple..
When you eventually get what you want.. you tend to want more.. and more and more... and the story goes on.. we will tend to get greedy.. and will never be satisfy with what we have? Because when things remain status quo for too long.. some will get bored.. some will feel too comfortable of what they have and tend to take advantage of it.. and some will start to look for something more challenging..
Some will feel conteded when they get "approval" or praised from others that what they have been doing correct.. some will just refuse to change because they are too comfortable with what they have because they are afraid of change? I'm afraid of uncertainty.. and so I never like to wait.. because by waiting.. I somehow handed my "future" to uncertainty.. and I'm afraid of uncertainty..
At times, I will hope that I'm bit more stronger.. thn I will not feel tired that easily.. that I will be ok with what ever that placed in front of me.. that I will have the courage to change what ever that I know can be better.. that I can stop crying in the middle of the night when I feel so helpless.. thn maybe I will see what I have missed out when I'm afraid of what I'm afraided.. and know that I'm not as alone as I thought.. and that the tears are there to remind me how it is like to feel happy.. and the coldness in the middle of the night is to remind me how it is like to feel warm.. and the loneliness is there to remind me how it is like when you have someone there for you.. But, will I eventually feel so these?